Funny
questions about South Africa!!
questions about South Africa!!
This Q&A has been doing the rounds on social media for a while.
These questions about South Africa were posted on a South African Tourism Website and were
answered by the website owner,
answered by the website owner,
who has a great sense of humour!
Q: Does it ever get windy in South
Africa ?
Africa ?
This was the only question that he did not answer…
The words are his(hers) and I added the images…
Q: I have never seen it rain on TV, so how do the plants grow? ( UK )
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.
Q: Will I be able to see elephants
in the street? ( USA )
in the street? ( USA )
A: Depends how much you’ve been drinking.
Q: I want to walk from Durban to
Cape Town – can I follow the railroad tracks? ( Sweden )
Cape Town – can I follow the railroad tracks? ( Sweden )
A: Sure, it’s only two thousand kilometers take lots of water…
Q: Is it safe to run around in the
bushes in South Africa ? ( Sweden )
bushes in South Africa ? ( Sweden )
A: So it’s true what they say about Swedes…
Q: Are there any ATMs (cash
machines) in South Africa ? Can you send me a list of them in JHB, Cape Town ,
Knysna and Jeffrey’s Bay? ( UK )
machines) in South Africa ? Can you send me a list of them in JHB, Cape Town ,
Knysna and Jeffrey’s Bay? ( UK )
A: What did your last slave die of?
Q: Can you give me some information
about Koala Bear racing in South Africa? ( USA )
about Koala Bear racing in South Africa? ( USA )
A: Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the pacific. A-fri-ca is the
big triangle shaped continent south of Europe which does not…oh forget it.
Sure, the Koala Bear racing is every Tuesday night in Hillbrow. Come naked.
big triangle shaped continent south of Europe which does not…oh forget it.
Sure, the Koala Bear racing is every Tuesday night in Hillbrow. Come naked.
Q: Which direction is north in South
Africa ? ( USA )
Africa ? ( USA )
A: Face south and then turn 90 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we’ll
send the rest of the directions.
send the rest of the directions.
Q: Can I bring cutlery into South
Africa ? ( UK )
Africa ? ( UK )
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.
Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys’
Choir schedule? ( USA )
Choir schedule? ( USA )
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is…oh
forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Hillbrow,
straight after the Koala Bear races. Come naked.
forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Hillbrow,
straight after the Koala Bear races. Come naked.
Q: Do you have perfume in South
Africa ? ( France )
Africa ? ( France )
A: No, WE don’t stink.
Q: I have developed a new product
that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in South
Africa ? ( USA )
that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in South
Africa ? ( USA )
A: Anywhere where a significant number of Americans gather.
Q: Can you tell me the regions in
South Africa where the female population is smaller than the male population? (
Italy )
South Africa where the female population is smaller than the male population? (
Italy )
A: Yes, gay nightclubs.
Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in
South Africa ? ( France )
South Africa ? ( France )
A: Only at Christmas.
Q: Are there killer bees in South
Africa ? ( Germany )
Africa ? ( Germany )
A: Not yet, but for you, we’ll import them.
Q: Are there supermarkets in Cape
Town and is milk available all year round?
Town and is milk available all year round?
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter-gatherers. Milk is
illegal.
illegal.
Q: Please send a list of all doctors
in South Africa who can dispense rattlesnake serum. ( USA )
in South Africa who can dispense rattlesnake serum. ( USA )
A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca, which is where YOU come from. All South
African snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good
pets.
African snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good
pets.
Q: I was in South Africa in 1969,
and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Hillbrow. Can you
help? ( USA )
and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Hillbrow. Can you
help? ( USA )
A: Yes, but you will probably still have to pay her by the hour.
Q: Will I be able to speak English
most places I go? ( USA )
most places I go? ( USA )
A: Yes, but you’ll have to learn it first.
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